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IN THE BEGINNING

The Sunday Morning Stains began back in the early 90s with four friends who were out to conquer "The Mountain." The golf course was being cut through the woods atop an East Tennessee mountain and The Stains had no fear of this most challenging stroll through peaks, valleys, rivers and giant boulders. The course soon earned the nickname "Messy" due to it's unforgiveable nature. The track was only nine holes in the beginning as Earl, the owner, designer and builder was chain-sawing his way across the back forty.

Today "The Mountain" is a matured 18 hole course that destroys the average golfer. Many visitors show up and talk about their game and how they shoot in the 80's. By the time they get half way through the back 9, the excuses start to come out. The Stains have heard them all and just quietly listen and smile. Of course being a Stain, you don't stay quiet for long and you don't cut the cry babies any slack. It's The Stains way. 

"Hit it where you want it, cuz that's where it's gonna be."

Double Barrell Darrell

"So let it be written, so let it be done"

The Mighty Pole Cat

"This ain't no taint."

Dakota Bob

The pictures above are a small sampling of the long history of The Stains. They are a lighthearted bunch of fellows and since their beginning these friends enjoyed their pleasant rounds of golf, but in the year 2000, all that changed. It was then they decided to start having competitive tournaments. It began on a cool November day. The Iron Shark Big Frank and his low-country crew were visiting from South Carolina and brought with them what would be the trophy for the first official tournament. The Franksgiving Challenge. The gauntlet had been thrown down, the prophecy had been written and so too was the next chapter of The Sunday Morning Stains.

The Sunday Morning Stains began as a foursome. There was The Mighty Pole Cat, Lonesome John Sykes, Double Barrell Darrell and me, The Boston Angler. The beginnings were humble. As time went by, the foursome would soon grow. Iron Mike was the first to weasel his way in. The foursome became a five-some. Luckily "The Mountain" was a remote track and not many people played the course. Earl, the owner, was a kind man and allowed the five-some to play. Soon word was out about The Stains. People began to hear the tall tales of debauchery and maddening golf that was being played. Many hackers would show up over the years, but most couldn't cut it. Those who did manage to survive the never ending smack talk, the 7 hour rounds, enjoying nature's finest, the local rules and other unmentionables, were to become members of a very select club. 

GO BIG OR GO HOME

ANYTHING TO WIN

It was soon after the inaugural Franksgiving Challenge tournament, that it was decided The Sunday Morning Stains would pay homage to the majors. Although by this time The Stains had recruited several new members including, Spot Howard, Dakota Bob, Big Frank, Top Shelf, Shifty, even our own caddie Baggy Pants, the decision was left to the charter members. Pole Cat, Iron Mike, Double Barrell Darrell and The Boston Angler would be the ones to supply the trophies. First up would be The Mountain Masters. It would be Iron Mike who would step up to the challenge with a custom designed exclusive Green Jacket. Next, The Boston Angler would deliver The U.S. Mountain Open reward, a trophy set on top of a stash box designed to hold the winning cards and the implements of destruction. The Mighty Pole Cat decided he would handle the task of The British Open Mountain Battle (The B.O.M.B) by creating nothing less than a bomb. Double Barrell had the perfect design for the fourth major, The MGA (Mountain Golfer's Association) he was a proud stain when he unveiled The Pineapple. Finally, Spot realized there was a fifth major so he tore down his daughter's cheerleading trophies to construct The Kelly Bundy for The Stained Players.

The first major was all set and would be played the second weekend in April. The Stains had spent the winter waiting for this moment. They had begun to taunt each other the week of their first major, The Mountain Masters. This was a closed tournament to all but The Stains. Of course The Stains motto is clear. "Anything to win." And to prove that point, The Boston Angler had a surprise for his fellow Stains. The warm spring day was met with a beautiful sunrise. The birds were singing. The flowers were blooming. The Stains were in the parking lot preparing for battle. Suddenly The Angler rolled in with windows rolled down and Ronny James Dio belting out The Rainbow Classic, "Man on The Silver Mountain."  His fellow Stains were ready with a Sunday morning greeting and making room for The Angler's ride in the parking lot when they spotted something in his pick-up they were not expecting. The Boston Angler had brought a stranger. He had broken the rules in his deception. He was indeed going to live by the motto "Anything to win." This was the day a new Stain was born. The day a new legend was created. The day The Stains first met his lordship, Lord Byron. It was also the day The Angler who had shaken up his brethren went on the win the coveted first Green Jacket.   

"Ever have a gum job?"

Lord Byron

"That's not my girlfriend, that's my wife!"

Iron Mike

"It's just some whiskey and my pistol. Now let's pray."

Big Frank, The Iron Shark

"You put the again in Mulligan."

The Mighty Polekat

CHAMPAGNE    CHOW MEIN    BE A STAIN

I was invited to play in 2001 by my good friend Double Barrel Darrel and was overwhelmed by the anything to win approach, I played 3 tournaments. As I was new to The Stains, I wanted to bring my son Razor into the the group and after a vote he too was allowed to play (he was my ringer) LOL

He won his first time out and I had forgotten to tell him about having to play in all the majors for a year to be eligible before you could claim the Jacket or any major trophy 🏆 He did win 3 of his first 4 majors but with nothing to show for it. It's tough being a Stain. However he's a Sheets and talked shit about the wins until he could claim a trophy for himself. He did well and held his own against the likes of Iron Mike, Dakota Bob, Spot Howard and the never present Polecat! Lol just kidding. Me on the other hand didn't win until 2019.

I'm blessed to share these outings with these men.

I'm sure proud to be a Sunday Morning Stain. I've always wanted to win a major and win I did. It was The Mountain Masters, and I'm the only Stain to keep it through two calendar years without hitting a stroke, just to lose it to one of the original stains The Boston Angler.
 

Here is a classic example of The Stains' motto...

Iron Mike on number 8. A par three named "Don't Go Left".

Named for the dangerous down the mountain shot

with death facing any golfer hitting their ball to the left.

Iron Mike has no fear.

He enjoys a nice walk through

the azaleas.

DEDICATED TO OUR GOOD FRIEND AND GREAT STAIN

DAKOTA BOB

Dakota Bob was one of the kindest and most generous people you could ever hope to meet.

He came on the scene a few years after The Stains had been established and much like

Razor, he came to win. When he learned you had to play a year's worth of Majors as a

non-Stain to become eligible, that only made him want to win more. Dakota Bob brought

with him a serious game, a hardy laugh and a display of humankind that shines on. He was 

famous for showing up and buying lunch not for The Stains, but for Scooby.

Scoob was the golf course dog and would be waiting every Sunday morning for us to tee off.

At the turn, Bob would buy a hot dog for himself and a hot dog for Scoob.

Dakota Bob left us far too soon and will forever be remembered in our hearts and by the

special tournament The Stains created just for him. The Bob.

The Bob is a three club challenge, where players are allowed to bring only three clubs to the tournament.

A challenge Dakota Bob would have loved!

IT TAKES BALLS TO BE A STAIN

We all know weather is important to any golfer.

The Boston Angler is not only a golf freak, but

he is also a weather freak and offers the

ANGLER'S FORECAST.

2022 IN REVIEW

LONESOME JOHN PREPARES FOR HIS RETURN TO THE MOUNTAIN.

LONESOME JOHN SYKES RETURNS WITH HIS MAGICAL 9 WOOD!

THE BOSTON ANGLER SERVES UP PIMENTO SANDWICHES.

SPOT RECIEVES THE GREEN JACKET FROM DEFENDING CHAMPION THE BOSTON ANGLER!

IRON MIKE WINS THE KELLY BUNDY

IRON MIKE TAKES HOME THE BOB FROM THE BOSTON ANGLER.

SPOT CONGRATULATES IRON MIKE AT THE U.S. MOUNTAIN OPEN!

DOUBLE BARREL MAKES HIS RETURN WITH A NEW FRIEND IN TOW!

IRON MIKE AND SPOT CELEBRATE THEIR WIN AT THE FOURTH OF JULY EXTRAVAGANZA!

IRON MIKE ENJOYS A MOMENT WITH THE PINEAPPLE... I'M SEEING A TREAND HERE!

A FROZEND TUNDRA AS THE STAINS PREPARE FOR THE CLAW... CAN POLEKAT MAKE IT A THREE-PEAT?

YES HE CAN! POLEKAT WINS HIS THIRD STAINS HANDICAP WITH AN IMPRESSIVE 88!